{"id":237293,"date":"2023-09-29T07:00:03","date_gmt":"2023-09-29T07:00:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/?p=237293"},"modified":"2023-09-29T07:00:03","modified_gmt":"2023-09-29T07:00:03","slug":"my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/","title":{"rendered":"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun"},"content":{"rendered":"

DEAR DEIDRE: I LET down my lover by choosing to stay with my long-term partner. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Now he says he has cancer and it\u2019s due to the stress I have caused him.<\/p>\n

He is 53, I\u2019m 50 and we were together for just over a year.<\/p>\n

We met at the gym and soon started confiding in each other about our failing relationships.<\/p>\n

We would go for a drink after our workout and found solace in each other. <\/p>\n

The sex was intense and I really felt a strong connection to him. <\/p>\n

Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team<\/h3>\n

Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.<\/p>\n

Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.<\/p>\n

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.<\/p>\n

We spent months sneaking around, planning our lives together.<\/p>\n

But then my partner of 20 years, who is 54, really started making an effort with me. <\/p>\n

Previously I had felt completely neglected and overlooked by him.<\/p>\n

He even took me away for a wonderful weekend and I began to remember all the good things about him, like his love of nature and his kindness.<\/p>\n

I knew on that weekend I would stay and make the most of the relationship.<\/p>\n

My decision did not go down well with my lover, but initially he said he respected it.<\/p>\n

That was until he started to harass me with text messages. <\/p>\n

He begged me to give him a second chance, and although I turned him down each time, the messages kept coming.<\/p>\n

I eventually blocked him and cut off contact. I hadn\u2019t heard from him for months until I got a phone call from an unknown number.<\/p>\n

It was him. He told me he\u2019d been diagnosed with cancer and it was all my fault. <\/p>\n

He said the stress I\u2019d caused him had affected his health.<\/p>\n

I know I\u2019m not to blame, but I feel awful and can\u2019t stop thinking of it.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n

MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE<\/h2>\n

<\/picture>DEAR DEIDRE <\/span><\/p>\n

My love rat husband can\u2019t handle the new me<\/h3>\n

<\/picture>DEIDRE'S STORIES <\/span><\/p>\n

Oliver's girlfriend is concerned about his gambling habits <\/h3>\n

DEIDRE SAYS:\u00a0<\/strong><\/span>You aren\u2019t to blame for this. It\u2019s not surprising it upset you.<\/p>\n

This man is hurting after your break-up and no doubt his long-term relationship is floundering. <\/p>\n

That, along with his health issues, will leave him feeling that his life is spiralling out of control.<\/p>\n

He is lashing out at you because he wants to make you feel guilty.<\/p>\n

It would be best not to entertain him. <\/p>\n

He clearly wants some kind of reaction and it\u2019s better to take a step back. <\/p>\n

My support pack Feeling Guilty will help.<\/p>\n

While you understandably feel bad, as you once cared for him deeply, the reality is there is nothing you can do to help him.<\/p>\n

Instead, focus on your marriage and moving forward.<\/p>\n

Most read in Dear Deidre<\/h2>\n

<\/picture>DEAR DEIDRE <\/span><\/p>\n

I broke my ex-lover’s heart, now he blames his life-threatening diagnosis on me<\/h3>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/picture>WORK WOES <\/span><\/p>\n

My girlfriend can’t keep a job and it’s ruining our relationship<\/h3>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/picture>THREE WAYS <\/span><\/p>\n

My biggest sexual fantasy is a threesome but girlfriend won’t consider it<\/h3>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/picture>CARRYING ON<\/span><\/p>\n

I wake up every day fearing my husband will stray because of his past<\/h3>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

Pictures posed by models.<\/em><\/p>\n

Source: Read Full Article<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

DEAR DEIDRE: I LET down my lover by choosing to stay with my long-term partner. Now he says he has cancer and it\u2019s due to the stress I have caused…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":237291,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nMy lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"DEAR DEIDRE: I LET down my lover by choosing to stay with my long-term partner. Now he says he has cancer and it\u2019s due to the stress I have caused…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"lovemainstream.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"mediabest\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:image\" content=\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/My-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-I-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-The-Sun.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"mediabest\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/\",\"name\":\"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/abc9aeefdadf991087d66599cfc40c8d\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Lifestyle\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/category\/lifestyle\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":3,\"name\":\"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/\",\"name\":\"lovemainstream.com\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/abc9aeefdadf991087d66599cfc40c8d\",\"name\":\"mediabest\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/38da2a5c83e5b947af91e83c833be9d1?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/38da2a5c83e5b947af91e83c833be9d1?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"mediabest\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com","og_description":"DEAR DEIDRE: I LET down my lover by choosing to stay with my long-term partner. Now he says he has cancer and it\u2019s due to the stress I have caused…","og_url":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/","og_site_name":"lovemainstream.com","article_published_time":"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00","author":"mediabest","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_image":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/My-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-I-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-The-Sun.jpg","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"mediabest","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/","url":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/","name":"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun - lovemainstream.com","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00","dateModified":"2023-09-29T07:00:03+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/abc9aeefdadf991087d66599cfc40c8d"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/lifestyle\/my-lover-blames-me-for-his-cancer-after-i-chose-to-stay-with-partner-after-affair-the-sun\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Lifestyle","item":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/category\/lifestyle\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"My lover blames me for his cancer after I chose to stay with partner after affair | The Sun"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/","name":"lovemainstream.com","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/abc9aeefdadf991087d66599cfc40c8d","name":"mediabest","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/38da2a5c83e5b947af91e83c833be9d1?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/38da2a5c83e5b947af91e83c833be9d1?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"mediabest"}}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/237293"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=237293"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/237293\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":237294,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/237293\/revisions\/237294"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/237291"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=237293"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=237293"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovemainstream.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=237293"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}